We entered seminary together in the fall of 2003. Over the years I took several classes together with her.
I wrote a joint paper with her in the winter of 2005 when we took the last UU Polity course that Peter Raible taught.
I remember her forthrightness, her humor, her heart for the poor. She volunteered at Tent City on several occasions. She participated in her church where she touched many lives.
She was a single mother of a 12-year-old boy. I remember she showed me her son's picture and told me how much she loved him.
I was at the grieving ceremony on Thursday night at the Woodinville UU church where I lighted a candle for her.
I am sad that she chose that final and absolute way to leave this world. I hope that her death will not be in vain. That through her death we will go deeper in our understanding of what it is to be there for one another, what it is to be a true community, in a suicide economy.
Friday, July 27, 2007
Sunday, July 22, 2007
The Eagle/chicken
A farmer found an eagle's egg and put it in the nest of a backyard hen. The eaglet hatched with the brood of chicks and grew up with them.
All his life the eagle did what the backyard chickens did, thinking he was a backyard chicken. He scratched the earth for worms and insects. He clucked and cackled. And he thrashed her wings and flew only a few feet into the air.
Years passed and the eagle/chicken grew older. One day he noticed a magnificent bird far above him in the cloudless sky. It glided in graceful majesty among the powerful wind currents, with scarcely a beat of his strong golden wings.
The eagle/chicken looked up in awe. "Who's that?" he asked.
"That's the eagle, the most magnificent of all the birds," said one of the backyard chickens. "The eagle belongs to the sky. We belong to the earth—we're chickens."
Then the eagle/chicken became surprised. “How did I become an earth-bound bird?” he asked. He looked at himself for the first time and discovered that he looked different from the chickens. He saw that he had stronger claws and a larger spread of wings than the chickens in the farm.
He desired intensely to fly like the eagle, magnificent above in the sky. But he was frightened.
“Look, I am used to scratching the earth for worms and insects. Where will I find the worms and insects to feed myself?" he asked himself. He was immensely terrified at the prospect of being free and flying into the unknown alone. Then again, he thought about his previous experience. He could fly only two or three feet into the air. “I can't fly like this eagle in the sky,” he said in despair to himself.
One day, the eagle/chicken noticed that he could fly a little faster than the chickens in the farmyard. He hurried to a short tree nearby, steeled himself and tried to fly. He flew about ten feet. He discovered that he enjoyed staying in the air, even if it was only a few seconds longer. Something within the eagle/chicken propelled him in the air. Unfortunately, he got tired too soon and fell down to the ground.
The chicken in the farm saw him. "We saw you fly. You looked like the magnificent eagle we saw the other day. Sooner or later, you are going to fly away into the deep blue sky, away from us," the chickens said. The eagle/chicken remained silent, not knowing what to say about such an unexpected comment. Encouraged, he went back a few days later, and while he tried flying again, he saw a wild eagle who took him in his wings. The wild eagle taught eagle/chicken the ways of eagles. Eagle/chicken learned to fly like all eagles do, hunt mice in the forest and fish in the river. After this encounter, eagle/chicken perched on the tallest tree, with a gentle wind blowing over him. He pondered how, as an earth-bound chicken in the farmyard, his life was incomplete and his potential was unrealized. "I am glad I discovered who I really am,” he said with teary eyes to himself. “I am glad I followed my dream."
All his life the eagle did what the backyard chickens did, thinking he was a backyard chicken. He scratched the earth for worms and insects. He clucked and cackled. And he thrashed her wings and flew only a few feet into the air.
Years passed and the eagle/chicken grew older. One day he noticed a magnificent bird far above him in the cloudless sky. It glided in graceful majesty among the powerful wind currents, with scarcely a beat of his strong golden wings.
The eagle/chicken looked up in awe. "Who's that?" he asked.
"That's the eagle, the most magnificent of all the birds," said one of the backyard chickens. "The eagle belongs to the sky. We belong to the earth—we're chickens."
Then the eagle/chicken became surprised. “How did I become an earth-bound bird?” he asked. He looked at himself for the first time and discovered that he looked different from the chickens. He saw that he had stronger claws and a larger spread of wings than the chickens in the farm.
He desired intensely to fly like the eagle, magnificent above in the sky. But he was frightened.
“Look, I am used to scratching the earth for worms and insects. Where will I find the worms and insects to feed myself?" he asked himself. He was immensely terrified at the prospect of being free and flying into the unknown alone. Then again, he thought about his previous experience. He could fly only two or three feet into the air. “I can't fly like this eagle in the sky,” he said in despair to himself.
One day, the eagle/chicken noticed that he could fly a little faster than the chickens in the farmyard. He hurried to a short tree nearby, steeled himself and tried to fly. He flew about ten feet. He discovered that he enjoyed staying in the air, even if it was only a few seconds longer. Something within the eagle/chicken propelled him in the air. Unfortunately, he got tired too soon and fell down to the ground.
The chicken in the farm saw him. "We saw you fly. You looked like the magnificent eagle we saw the other day. Sooner or later, you are going to fly away into the deep blue sky, away from us," the chickens said. The eagle/chicken remained silent, not knowing what to say about such an unexpected comment. Encouraged, he went back a few days later, and while he tried flying again, he saw a wild eagle who took him in his wings. The wild eagle taught eagle/chicken the ways of eagles. Eagle/chicken learned to fly like all eagles do, hunt mice in the forest and fish in the river. After this encounter, eagle/chicken perched on the tallest tree, with a gentle wind blowing over him. He pondered how, as an earth-bound chicken in the farmyard, his life was incomplete and his potential was unrealized. "I am glad I discovered who I really am,” he said with teary eyes to himself. “I am glad I followed my dream."
Saturday, July 14, 2007
On Inner Peace
What's wealth, power, and fame without peace of mind?
Ananse was in his mid-thirties. He had a wife and two children. He had worked his father’s farm. No matter how hard he worked, he remained in debt. He decided to end his financial troubles. He traveled to a far away village to consult a medicine man.
The medicine man asked Ananse for the name of a dear family member. Ananse gave him his wife’s name. The medicine man performed a ritual and told Ananse that when he returned home, money would be in his closet. He also told him that he should not weep for anyone who died when he was away.
When Ananse got home he discovered his wife was dead. His wife’s sudden death shocked and saddened him but he obeyed the medicine man. He did not weep for his wife. He discovered that his wife died on the same day and at the same time that the medicine man asked him for her name.
Ananse opened his closet. He found boxes of hundred dollar bills. Ananse became wealthy overnight. Ananse built many houses. He remarried. He became a respectable member in the society. But Ananse was not happy. Every night, as he closed his eyes to sleep, he would see his wife, weeping, pleading to be set free.
Ananse could not drive his wife’s spirit away. Gradually, the wise men and women in the village found out what Ananse had done. They did not banish him. They allowed him to stay in the town but no one had any dealings with him. Although Ananse had all the money he wanted, he lost his relationship with his family and the community. He did not have peace of mind.
Many of us are like Ananse making the choice unknowingly between what the world promises us and our peace of mind. If you knew you could be the richest person in the world and lose your friends and family and your peace of mind, what would you do? And if you knew you could be the most famous person and most powerful individual but would lose your family and friends and your sanity what would you do?
Peace springs within us in a well that does not dry. Access to that peace is independent of what happens to us from the outside world. Our spiritual Elders have told us about a priceless diamond within us that we must all mine. They have reminded us over and over again that we should desire this peace within us above everything else. For some this peace within is synonymous to the presence of God and to the Kingdom of God.
I leave you with the words of Joel S. Goldsmith as he describes the process of obtaining this inner peace. As you meditate on these words, you may substitute God with the word peace. See what happens when you spend some time in this frame of mind. Shalom!
“If I desire God with all my heart and with all my soul and with all my mind, do I have room left to desire anything else and is there anything for me to desire after I have given my whole desire to God? I desire only God - to know You rightly - to live consciously in Your presence. This is my desire and all other desires I surrender to You. No longer do I have any desire but to know You rightly. Ambition? What ambition is there? What is there that I could be ambitious for after I have known God? Is there something in the world of greater value than God? Is there something of greater benefit than God? No. No. Knowing God, having God, I can have no further ambition, and I can surrender my ambition unto You. Hope, desire, ambition, fear. All these I surrender. And now, there is nothing left in the external world for me to be attached to.”
For a complete text of this meditation visit: http://www.beyondprayerandmeditation.com/bd010a2.htm
Ananse was in his mid-thirties. He had a wife and two children. He had worked his father’s farm. No matter how hard he worked, he remained in debt. He decided to end his financial troubles. He traveled to a far away village to consult a medicine man.
The medicine man asked Ananse for the name of a dear family member. Ananse gave him his wife’s name. The medicine man performed a ritual and told Ananse that when he returned home, money would be in his closet. He also told him that he should not weep for anyone who died when he was away.
When Ananse got home he discovered his wife was dead. His wife’s sudden death shocked and saddened him but he obeyed the medicine man. He did not weep for his wife. He discovered that his wife died on the same day and at the same time that the medicine man asked him for her name.
Ananse opened his closet. He found boxes of hundred dollar bills. Ananse became wealthy overnight. Ananse built many houses. He remarried. He became a respectable member in the society. But Ananse was not happy. Every night, as he closed his eyes to sleep, he would see his wife, weeping, pleading to be set free.
Ananse could not drive his wife’s spirit away. Gradually, the wise men and women in the village found out what Ananse had done. They did not banish him. They allowed him to stay in the town but no one had any dealings with him. Although Ananse had all the money he wanted, he lost his relationship with his family and the community. He did not have peace of mind.
Many of us are like Ananse making the choice unknowingly between what the world promises us and our peace of mind. If you knew you could be the richest person in the world and lose your friends and family and your peace of mind, what would you do? And if you knew you could be the most famous person and most powerful individual but would lose your family and friends and your sanity what would you do?
Peace springs within us in a well that does not dry. Access to that peace is independent of what happens to us from the outside world. Our spiritual Elders have told us about a priceless diamond within us that we must all mine. They have reminded us over and over again that we should desire this peace within us above everything else. For some this peace within is synonymous to the presence of God and to the Kingdom of God.
I leave you with the words of Joel S. Goldsmith as he describes the process of obtaining this inner peace. As you meditate on these words, you may substitute God with the word peace. See what happens when you spend some time in this frame of mind. Shalom!
“If I desire God with all my heart and with all my soul and with all my mind, do I have room left to desire anything else and is there anything for me to desire after I have given my whole desire to God? I desire only God - to know You rightly - to live consciously in Your presence. This is my desire and all other desires I surrender to You. No longer do I have any desire but to know You rightly. Ambition? What ambition is there? What is there that I could be ambitious for after I have known God? Is there something in the world of greater value than God? Is there something of greater benefit than God? No. No. Knowing God, having God, I can have no further ambition, and I can surrender my ambition unto You. Hope, desire, ambition, fear. All these I surrender. And now, there is nothing left in the external world for me to be attached to.”
For a complete text of this meditation visit: http://www.beyondprayerandmeditation.com/bd010a2.htm
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