On being there

Over the past weeks, I’ve noticed I’m coming to an understanding of a way of relating to others. I call it "being there."

Being there is a state of mind. An emptying of the self so that the other may be filled. A decreasing of the little self so that the greater Self may increase. Being there is being lived. I used to be the marker that wrote on the board. Now I’m becoming the board on which the markings are etched and cleaned because I’m learning to be there.

Suicide

We entered seminary together in the fall of 2003. Over the years I took several classes together with her.

I wrote a joint paper with her in the winter of 2005 when we took the last UU Polity course that Peter Raible taught.

I remember her forthrightness, her humor, her heart for the poor. She volunteered at Tent City on several occasions. She participated in her church where she touched many lives.

She was a single mother of a 12-year-old boy. I remember she showed me her son's picture and told me how much she loved him.

I was at the grieving ceremony on Thursday night at the Woodinville UU church where I lighted a candle for her.

I am sad that she chose that final and absolute way to leave this world. I hope that her death will not be in vain. That through her death we will go deeper in our understanding of what it is to be there for one another, what it is to be a true community, in a suicide economy.

Farewell, Ed and Alphise

Sunday, 10 June 2007, was the last Sunday of the church year at Edmonds Unitarian Universalist Congregation. It was also Rev. Dr. Edward Brock's last day in the pulpit, ending his seven years as minister of this 330-member- liberal religious community.
"I believe...that my time for leadership here has passed. There is a need for new energy and talent to lead this wonderful congregation to even greater heights of achievement and service," Rev. Dr. Ed Brock wrote in a letter of 18 May 2007 he sent to Members and Friends of EUUC.
At the parting service, I was among seven people who spoke about Rev. Ed. Brock's legacy. Here's the full text of my talk.

Farewell, Alphise and Rev Dr. Ed Brock
Kwami E. Nyamidie

I was born in Togo, West Africa, a land far away....For someone from far away, it is important to find a welcoming community...

I found my community at this church...Being involved in this church changed my life. I came here through Alphise and you, and met Bruce, and one thing led to the other. I went to seminary and graduate school.

Now I am on my own course of ministry; my choices include becoming a minister or DRE. I have chosen a path that seems genuine to me, the work of spiritual direction. I am now building my spiritual direction practice.

One of our hymns speaks of how our community of faith gives us roots and wings. Roots ground us in what is firm and sure, and wings give us freedom. You have helped in giving me roots that ground my being; I am now preparing to take wing to rise as the spirit of life guides me.

Someone has said that we all have different needs at different stages of our lives. For me, this church, and you, Ed, have helped me make important decisions at a critical point in my life. For that I am deeply grateful.

Through this church and you, Ed, I have built relationships with some people here that will last a lifetime. For that also, I am deeply grateful.

As this congregation looks to its future, may you build a "community that nurtures spiritual growth, celebrates the interdependence of all life, and works to bring justice and compassion into every dimension of the lives of its members."

Ed, as you venture into your future, may you experience constant enrichment of your life and ministry.

Here is link to the sermons of Rev. Dr Ed Brock